Do You Operate Out of Fear or Love?
Whether or not we realize it, we all operate from one of two spaces in everything we do. When we communicate or interact with someone we are subconsciously doing it from either a space of fear or love. For some, they have developed defense mechanisms at a very young age that have inherently taught them to enter into conversations and relationships with fear. They might feel like someone is going to take something from them, or do something to harm them, and as a result, they relate as such. For those who operate from a place of love, they tend to be openhearted and trusting with the way they converse.
When this concept was introduced to me by my life coach, Thea, I started to ask myself this question after everything I did. I would simply say "Did I do that out of fear out of love?” If I answered the question and I felt it was fear, I would dig deeper and see specifically what is it that I am fearful of or what am I fearful this person will do? I encourage you to do the same.
Habits of People Who Operate Out of Love
They are friends with all kinds of people.
When you operate from a place of love, there is no limit to the variety of different people you will create relationships with. In today’s polarized world, it can be a challenge to relate to people who believe differently than you. For those who operate out of love, those differences provide only kindle to the fire of a beautiful friendship and meaningful conversation.
They create a safe space.
Whether they know it or not, people who operate out of a place of love have a skill for making people feel safe. With their words, actions and demeanor, others feel safe coming to this person with questions and difficult conversations. Within that safe space, fear of judgement is lost.
They have an abundance mentality.
When you operate from a place of love, you believe there is enough room for everyone to succeed. You are not are not worried that there is not enough opportunity to go around. Because of their deep-rooted inner confidence, they know how to encourage others and are not threatened by the ambition or desires of those around them.
Habits of People Who Operate Out of Fear
They give time to their anxious thoughts.
Everyone deals with anxious thoughts at one time or another, but the biggest difference with people who operate out of fear is that they create mental space for those anxious thoughts and let them stay. They have become comfortable with their anxieties and spend too much time overthinking, therefore creating more negative thought patterns that in response, cause them to operate from a place of fear.
They lack confidence.
People who operate out of fear often feel that they have limited value to offer either to their work, their relationships, and those around them. As a result, they become territorial about those aspects of their life, living in fear that someone could take that away from them. What they fail to realize is that they have immense skill and value to bring to the table. They just need a healthy dose of confidence.
They don’t create space for growth opportunities.
This often stems from a general lack of confidence, but those who operate from a place of fear aren’t often willing to try new things and acquire new skills. As a result, they don’t create room for growth in the work that they do or in their relationships with those around them. They have become perfectly comfortable with how things are, a dangerous mentality that gets in the way of success, growth and joy.
When you practice responding from a place of love, it truly becomes your primary way of operating and you immediately notice a difference both in how you feel, but also in the responses you receive from those around you. It takes practice, but start asking yourself if your actions and responses are coming from a place of fear or love. It is a powerful exercise that makes you aware of your way of being and holds you responsible for the way you make others feel. Remember there is always room for growth and when you commit yourself to making others feel loved, there is no limit to what you are capable of doing.